The Importance of having a group of Brothers

For the past week, I have been travelling in Egypt with a group of brothers I connected with online. All of these people were guys I had spoken to at length over message and even met up with once or twice before.

So going into this, I had a faint idea of what to expect. 

But everything else was in the dark. Everyone except the organiser knew what was planned. Effectively, we had bought into something that we knew nothing about. Throughout the group we all had a gut feeling that it would be more than worth it.

And it was. 

The Egyptian Adventure

As we were all coming from different areas of the world, we had to organise a spot to fly in to. Luckily it worked out that we landed in Cairo around 12pm to then catch the flight to Luxor, where we would be staying for the majority of the adventure. Overlooking the river Nile. 

Over the course of our exploration, we visited many temples throughout Luxor. Of all sorts of shapes and sizes, all with a sense of unity and a sense of difference too.

As if the temples had been created under one architect and then individually customised as the years passed. The stories didn’t seem to add up and I’m very curious as to what some of the hieroglyphs on the walls meant. And as it turns out, these images are not as old as the structures themselves.

They show giant people, anthropomorphs, floating heads, fish people, strange devices, wars and even tree motifs. 

The story of Egypt is confusing and hard to understand, but this experience has sparked an intrigue. Why don’t we know more about it?

Though, this is a topic for another day.

The exploring brothers

Throughout this trip, I was accompanied by some of the greatest people I have ever met. All of us had a unique vision, story and background. With different personality traits that meshed perfectly with everyone.

One thing that stuck out to me was that even in the 40°c + heat (100°f) none of us had a falling out. We all rolled on with the jokes that were said, helped each other with embarrassments and never took things too far. 

In my mind, this was a true and special connection that had been created. I don’t think I could’ve done this trip with my friends at home under the same circumstances, which says a lot as these brothers were extremely new to me. 

The days consisted of adventuring over old ruins and the desert. Whilst in the evening would be a relaxing trip over the Nile to a restaurant of some description. During these relaxing moments, we encouraged one another to open up about deep issues and topics that needed addressing. 

Things that haven’t been spoken about for years or even thought about. And yet here we found ourselves opening up about deep trauma that no one has heard before. Be it on the Nile or in Giza in front of the pyramids.

It was these moments of release that I felt the strongest connection. Personally, I love to connect deeply with myself and others about personal issues. It’s special to me and so being able to do it with a group who were on the same page or wavelength, was an experience worth paying for again.

I never realised how much I felt pulled towards a group of brothers who I can share my deepest insecurities with. To know that they don’t judge and are actively listening, with either similar stories or experiences themselves. All with the intent of self growth in the spirit of harmony. 

I’m glad to have been able to be part of such a group and am looking to surround myself with people like these in the future. Whether with these brothers, or others, only the future can tell.

Why call it a Brotherhood

I don’t often use the term brother for someone or a group of people because it’s used so frequently in cheap ways online. People throw these words around like they mean nothing, and so, the word itself loses meaning.

Think about masculinity. What does that bring to mind?

If you’re in a similar circle online as I’ve been in, you can imagine some bald dude with 16 mistresses, a cigar in hand, a boatload of cash and an overly aggressive frame to “attack” the world with. 

Probably selling you some snake oil as his personality. 

It feels like a far cry to what brothers or even masculinity meant. They aren’t words to dust on every cake you bake, if you get what I mean. 

They’re words to use when you really have them. A brotherhood isn’t a discord group full of “men” nor is masculinity an aggressive guy selling you things you’re better off without. 

Yet, for the first time in my life I met a true group of men. Men I call brothers because they’re quietly practising what they preach. Doing what they love, and interested in creating real life groups, going to real life places. 

I felt more vulnerable than I’ve ever felt in my life, sharing really emotional insecurities, in front of 7 other people who felt the same way. And yet, this experience alone was worth more than all the snake oil merchants that sell you things online. 

If I have nothing else to work towards, I at least want to work towards meeting these brothers in real life again. I want to collaborate with them and grow with them. I want to share more experiences with them.

And as much as the ancestral views have been pushed into the meme sphere. I feel a great urge to meet more with brothers as our forefathers did.

We have never had so many opportunities to connect with people on our wavelength before. And never before in history have we been so isolated. 

We’ve been forced to larp online as people we’re not. Find niche groups of extremists on both sides of the fence because everything is off limits. Forced and pushed and flailed to hide behind profile pictures of people who were greater than ourselves. We’ve been neutered from the Soul of the World. 

Conclusion 

Brotherhoods like this are hard to find by design. This past week I felt I’ve grown more than in the last few years.

It’s helped me identify more hidden trauma. More things to work on. A path for me to follow and most importantly that I need to love & trust myself more.

I’ve been going through life with a daemon on my shoulder. One with a whip that continues to strike anytime I try to follow my own heart. 

I wasn’t able to see this as it has become so normal, yet surrounded by people who love and care for me. They’re able to speak directly to me about this.

On some occasions, I opened myself up and their words shot straight to my heart. Really hitting the mark, but making me realise that I have problems I’ve got to deal with myself. 

No more looking to others for help, assistance or guidance. No more changing the course of my life based on what others think, regardless of whether it comes from a place of love or not. 

This group made me realise that I don’t trust myself. I don’t love myself. How could I when I’ve always sought external advice to follow or people to like me. 

Realising this hurt, a lot. And working on it will hurt harder. My path has to be different and as such I have to bear my own cross. 

But I know for a fact I have 7 integrated Brothers behind me, cheering me up the mountain of my own trauma. And this knowledge alone is enough to keep me going.

Find your tribe. Your people. Your Brothers or Sisters. 

If you feel you can be vulnerable in front of them, do it. And create a meaningful bond that will last. Real connections like this is how change happens and if it’s directed towards growth, in the spirit of harmony. 

One outcome is assured. 

I hope you enjoyed this article,

Elliott.